I Had a Dream
by ducky72
Summary: Variation on my story 'Notice of Resignation'. Abby had wanted to leave ... secretely ... at night. Or has it only been a dream? ... And what if this dream comes true in the end? GABBY
1. I Had a Dream

_**A/N:** Some of you asked for a continuation of "Notice of Resignation" but I had no idea how to, until Kelly came up with the suggestion of a dream sequence about two months ago. Sorry, Kelly, that at some point I stopped telling you more about the progress of this story, but I had my reasons. One reason, to be honest! Here it is: Happy Birthday, Kelly! This story is for you. Hope you like the way it turned out :-P_

_**Summery:**__ Gibbs seems to only have dreamt what happened in "Notice of Resignation"._

_**Disclaimer:**__ I do not own the characters. I just borrowed them and will return them unharmed. I hope that especially our Special Agent Gibbs does not mind what I put him through._

_**Warning:**__ This is going to be a very dramatic scenario. It is sort of a variation on my story "Notice of Resignation" with a nasty twist in it. Don´t dare to blink, you might miss something! You do not necessarily have to have read "Notice of Resignation" as I will give a more or less detailed summery inside here (in italics) and you can afterwards decide whether to read the story "I had a dream" is based upon._

_Moreover: __**Rated**__ T for swearing and implying of what __**still **__is left to your innocent imagination ;-)_

_**Beta:**__ Pretty Dead Flower. Thanks Molly for your always great work._

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_**-xxx-**_

**I Had A Dream -- A Variation on "Notice of Resignation"**

_**-xxx-**_

**1. I Had a Dream**

Gibbs woke with a start, panting heavily and bathed in cold sweat. Sitting up straight he tried to focus on his surroundings, blinking several times and when that didn´t help much, he squeezed his eyes shut and buried his face in his hands, trying to get his breathing under control. He remained in this position for two or three minutes until his breathing was halfway back to normal again.

Then he took a deep breath and ran his hands over his face before he looked around and realized that he must have fallen asleep under his boat again, like he had so many times before. His heart was still pounding heavily in his chest and his muscles hurt. Lowering his head and slowly rolling it from one side to the other with closed eyes, he tried to work out the tension in his neck, and he kept inhaling deeply to fight down the other tension that his dream had caused in a lower part of his body.

For more than one week now, he had been haunted by nightmares. Night after excruciating night. Abby ... yelling at him. Abby ... ignoring him. Abby ... pushing him away whenever he got near her. Each night his dreams got worse and each day when he went down to Abby´s lab he always was afraid that his dreams would come true pretty soon because Abby was acting rather weird these past days. And he felt helpless.

She didn´t say much if not anything, she seldom looked at him and her voice was getting more and more flat and uninterested. Something was wrong with her, but he hadn´t found out by now. He simply wasn´t able to get through to her. The more he tried, the more she retreated within herself. And at night, when he eventually fell asleep, she got mad at him in his dreams.

This night´s dream, however, had been different. He remembered each detail of it as if it had been real...

_**-x-**_

_Abby hadn´t yelled. Abby hadn´t lashed out wildly all around her. _

_Abby had had the intention to leave. _

_In his dream she had smiled at him before he left work in the evening and she had told him she would not have finished the tests before the next morning. He had left and it was then that his dream turned into a nightmare as he saw her placing the results at his desk along with a request for vacation and her notice of resignation._

_He had suddenly found himself standing behind her, very close, and then Abby had turned around and had directly stared into his eyes. She had almost screamed with fright and had wanted to secretly remove her notice of resignation. But he had held her in place and had grabbed the sheets of paper from her, reading them in utter dismay._

"_Why?" he had demanded an explanation and although Abby had not been able to avoid his gaze, she had refused to give an answer. Eventually he had yelled at her. "Spit it, Abs!" She was trying to hide something from him and in a desperate attempt to flee she had pecked him on his cheek. It had worked. He hadn´t been able to react when she rushed off towards the elevator, which had instantly opened and she had disappeared._

_No, not exactly. Somehow he had managed to follow her and then they had both been standing in the cubicle and after it had started to descend, he had stopped it like he used to on so many occasions and he had approached her in the ghostly half-darkness of the suddenly threatening confinement of a stuck elevator. He had not given up his intention to make her tell him why she wanted to leave her job. But Abby had continued to refuse an explanation._

_The most shocking moment of his nightmare had been when he had suddenly asked her, "...Or do I need to give you a reason?" and the next moment he had kissed her. No, worse than that, he had forced his tongue into her mouth out of the utter despair which had taken hold of him, because he __**must not**__ let her go whatever the cost, because he loved her. _

_And things still kept getting worse. Abby hadn´t fought what he was doing. She had reacted in a way that had shown him that he was the reason why she wanted to leave. In his dream she had finally told him that she loved him, too. And if that hadn´t already been enough, he hadn´t woken up, but in his dream the two of them then were making love ... hell, no ... they were having sex in the elevator at NCIS headquarters!_

_**-x-**_

_To be continued..._

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Has it all just been a dream? A nightmare? Nightmares can be very depressing, I´m sure you all have experienced this. And what if...?


	2. Too Late

_**A/N:** Thanks for all the reviews you left so far. I have to admit there wasn´t much new happening in chapter one, so here is more._

_What if dreams become true?  
_

_**-xxx-**_

**2. Too Late**

"Damn it!" Gibbs rubbed his eyes and tried to get rid of the sexually arousing images of his dream which were still occupying his dazed mind.

Thank god it had only been a dream! Never would he be able to forgive himself if he told Abby about his true feelings for her. That he loved her.

Actually he had liked her since he had first known her, but he had been married and for him it had always been out of question to feel more for another woman while being married. And after his divorce, he had continued to suppress his feelings, because Abby was ... much younger than him ... less complicated than him ... other than he, able to frankly show her feelings ... too beautiful and too valuable to be broken by his moodiness, stubbornness and his eccentricities, let alone his constant disappearances to the depths of his basement.

The best way to not make her his victim was to just be a friend and be there and take care of her whenever she needed someone whom she could pour out her heart to and to never admit to her or himself that he had fallen in love with her.

And it had worked. Sure, there were those days when Abby was getting too specific about her sexual preferences, so to speak. She had no problems with that either, didn't put any restraint on herself in his presence and he even had the suspicion that she enjoyed teasing him with this. In the beginning her honesty had amused him. But when his body began to react to her allusions, he had had to find a way to stop her from being so simply open. He did so by telling her in a playful manner, "Too much information, Abs".

And now, something was wrong with Abby. She had been unusually quiet lately and she refused to talk with him about what was bothering her. That not only made him worry about her, it also had made these odd dreams start, because he was afraid that Abby was getting mad at him if he didn't stop getting on her nerves by constantly asking her about what was wrong.

Right now he couldn't do anything but hope that things would get back to normal soon. But obviously, the tension within him had gotten too intense and his mind had come up with that crazy dream.

Gibbs took his hands from his face as his agitation had almost calmed down and he looked at his watch to find out what time it was. There, he found he had a problem. His vision was blurred and he somehow wasn't able to read the time. How ever hard he tried, his watch didn't make sense. Probably the battery was low.

"Damn it!" Gibbs cursed again and decided that he wouldn't be able to sleep anyhow. He could just as well get up and into work.

Next thing he consciously became aware of was, that the doors of the elevator slid open and he stepped into the squad-room. Part of him was still busy mulling over the weird dream while another part of him suddenly asked, "Why don't you have a coffee with you?"

But the doors of the elevator had already closed, so he let his gaze wander around the squad-room. He still wasn't able to see properly. Things seem to be blurred, even in the near distance.

The day was already dawning and a few agents were working at their computers. Gibbs walked over to his desk and before he sat down, he briefly wondered why his entire team was already there, although it was pretty early in the morning.

"There a new case, which I haven't been told of yet?" Gibbs asked with bewilderment and earned three "No's."

Neither of his agents looked up from whatever they were doing and Gibbs just wanted to say something, when his look fell upon a sheet on his desk. It was a list of numbers followed by a few words. 'Results', the title read.

The letters and figures began to blur before Gibbs's eyes. In his hand he held the results, which he had expected to be ready yesterday evening. Abby had told him, they wouldn't be ready before this morning. The same she had told him in his dream that night. Grabbing the sheet of paper he brought it closer to his face, so he would be able to read what exactly it said. The numbers, the words ... everything read exactly the same as it had in his dream!

A cold shudder ran down his spine. Hit by inexplicable premonitions he laid the sheet aside and the next moment he found himself staring at another sheet. 'Request of Vacation'.

"No!" he whispered and he instantly knew that what he saw was the same he had seen in his dream and he didn't even bother to read the sheet that came next as the letters on it started to dance before his eyes and he felt as if he was running through an ocean of letters that surrounded him and they spelled 'Notice of Resignation!'

When Gibbs reached the elevator that led down to Abby's lab he realized that Tony, Ziva or McGee -- no-one had asked him where he was going, none of them seemed to even have noticed that he wasn't at his desk anymore.

"Damn it!" Gibbs swore as the elevator didn't react to his calling. He saw people leaving and entering the elevator upstairs, but it never stopped at this floor. He eventually gave up and headed for the staircase. Reeling down the stairs he felt as if he went upstairs rather than downstairs. It seemed to take him hours and it literally felt as if he was walking through jelly. Was it really that many steps? They seemed to never end and it felt like hours till he finally rushed into Abby's lab.

Which ... was empty.

_To be continued..._

_**-xxx-**_

_What do you expect Gibbs to do next? _

_Be back for chapter 3: **Gone**_


	3. Gone

**3. Gone**

"Abby!" Gibbs was gasping for breath.

His dream was coming to life and this reality was vastly becoming a nightmare. Abby had left and he hadn´t even been given the chance to hold her back. Or maybe it wasn´t too late already?

Gibbs reached for his cell phone, flipped it open and he started to dial Abby´s number. Which turned out to be more difficult than he thought. Was it his nervousness, the turmoil which was merciless building up inside him? Or why -- hell _**why**_ -- did he constantly punch in the wrong number?

Clutching any straw he could think of, Gibbs started off for his car. _It just can´t be too late_, he kept telling himself. He would drive over to Abby´s apartment, would talk to her, would ask her to _**not **_leave, because he wouldn´t be able to go on without her. He needed her, needed her light manner, her smile, her laughter. Her teasing. He needed her because he loved her and hell, if there was no other way to hold her back then he would once -- and only once -- listen to his dreams and eventually tell her, would admit that he loved her, even if she would be mad at him for the rest of her life, because things couldn´t get worse than they already were.

Barely did he know when he left the NCIS-building that things _**could**_ get worse. Much worse!

First, Gibbs searched the parking lot for his car, which only added to his despair. During all this time he was constantly trying to dial Abby´s number correctly. Once he had succeeded in this usually so easy task, he kept pressing the phone to his ear, listening to the monotonous sound which seemed to echo in the parking lot.

Damn, he could have sworn that he had parked it here -- as always. Bit by bit his nervousness was replaced by anger and it took him a while to figure out what was wrong. He had parked his car at the same place as always. It was _him_, who was searching on the wrong level!

"ABBY!" he yelled. "Pick up your damn phone!"

"Gibbs?" After what seemed like hours, someone finally answered the phone. A faint voice carried through the crackling noises in the phone line.

"Abby!" Gibbs shouted desperately, but before he could continue, he realized that the line was dead again. Gibbs started to panic. He slammed his cell onto the passenger seat of his car and sped off.

He couldn´t remember the drive as he was suddenly standing in front of Abby´s apartment. Rushing up the stairs he begged she would still be there.

The door to the apartment was wide ajar and he stumbled inside and into her living-room ... and his heart immediately wanted to fail its duty.

The apartment was empty. Completely empty. Not the tiniest mote of dust had been left behind. Not the tiniest!

His lips formed a silent "No!" while Gibbs desperately tried to breathe as the room around him started spinning. What was she doing to him?? What had he done to her that she left him like this??

"Aaaaaaab-byyyyyyyyyy!" He cried out her name as loud as he could manage to, his own voice echoing in his ear.

"Gibbs?" The familiar faint voice let him spin around and stare at the open door.

"Abs?" Gibbs whispered under his breath and while feverishly listening as everything was silent again, he slowly walked towards the apartment door. Ghostly silence hummed in his ears. Could it be he was in the wrong apartment, on the wrong floor again?

"Abby?" he asked into the strange silence. Then he tried again, a little louder this time as he entered the stairwell of the apartment building. He felt panic rise again. His pulse quickened and his breathing merciless slipped out of his control again.

"Gibbs!" There it was again. The voice still sounded very far away and he could not see anyone but he guessed it was coming from downstairs.

"Abby!" Gibbs once more shouted her name at the top of his voice and he started to rush down the stairs.

Suddenly the steps beneath his feet turned to jelly and in utter despair Gibbs tried to get a grip on the railing, but he failed.

And then he fell.

Deeper and even deeper and nothing seemed to be able to stop his fall.

It felt as if someone drove his fist into his sternum, robbing him off his breath.

Then he saw himself lying on the landing.

_To be continued..._

_**A/N:**** Ah Kelly, I can hear you scream from over here. **_

_**And w****hat about you others? Don´t hesitate to vent your emotions... Last chapter will be up soon!**_


	4. Relief

_A/N: Well, you are confused? That´s exactly the way I wanted it at that point. Here´s the last chapter. Thanks Molly for your always great betaing._

**_-xxx-_**

**4. Relief**

Darkness engulfed him. His heart was pounding heavily and he squeezed his eyes shut at the intense wave of pain that rushed through his body. Each muscle was hurting and dizziness made him nauseous. He slowly realized that he was lying half on his stomach in a rather odd position. He tried to move and tried to breathe, but both seemed to be almost impossible. He managed to move a finger or two, but he wasn´t sure about their position.

Then he started to remember. Bit by bit he remembered what had happened. Abby gone, the empty apartment, his fall -- and despite the pain he squeezed his eyes shut even tighter, cramping his hand around something soft and he forced an excruciating, drawled "Abby," while he doubled up in cramps, his breathing completely out of control now.

"Gibbs!" A desperate and tearful voice reached his ear. "Gibbs, calm down, Gibbs," the voice pleaded in a soothing tone.

Someone touched his arm, caressing it gently while whispering reassuring words. With some difficulties Gibbs eventually managed to open his eyes, finding himself lying prone and in a somewhat twisted position in a bed. Abby was sitting upright in bed beside him. He wasn´t really able to move and just kept staring into Abby´s worried eyes. Abby started to draw soothing circles on the back of his hand which was still desperately clutching the pillow and she gently ran the back of her left hand over his temple and his heated cheek.

"I am here, Gibbs. You had a nightmare." Abby´s words and her caressing helped ease the tension as Gibbs´s mind tried to separate what had been a dream and what had been real.

Abby had indeed reacted strange the last few days. She had indeed avoided his gaze. But she had never yelled at him or even pushed him away. That had only happened in his dreams, which had haunted him again and again the past nights.

Abby had indeed told him the previous evening that the results he was waiting for would not be available till this morning. But her strange behaviour had made Gibbs uneasy. He had had that odd feeling in his gut which had made him stay at the office in a dark corner this night to lie in ambush and find out.

Abby indeed had had the intention to leave, she had sneaked up to his desk in the darkness to leave her notice of resignation. But thanks to his gut Abby had not been able to run away unnoticed, to leave behind an empty apartment. And most of all -- Gibbs did _not_ have to face a future without her and he had _not_ fallen down the stairwell of her apartment building. That again had only happened in his dream.

The events of that night had mingled with his fears of what might have happened if he had not been there to prevent Abby from handing in her letter of resignation and as exhaustion and relieve were taking its toll on him, these fears had played out in this dream, turning it into a terrifying nightmare.

Gibbs was pretty much relieved that he had been able to hold Abby back from leaving, even if that had happened in a very dramatic way in the elevator of NCIS headquarters. And he now knew, why his muscles hurt, especially his neck, as he now understood that what had happened in the elevator had not been a dream at all.

He groaned as he tried to stretch his neck and Abby bent over and started to gently massage the tensed muscles.

"Sorry, Gibbs," Abby leaned down to run her lips over the marks she had left on his neck some hours ago. She felt guilty, so she was relieved to see a smile appear on Gibbs lips. He had meanwhile remembered every detail of what had happened before the two of them had fallen asleep rather exhausted in Abby´s bed.

"It´s OK, Abs." Gibbs shifted into a more comfortable position and he brought his hand to Abby´s thigh and started to caress it lightly for several minutes.

"Gibbs!" Abby giggled and sat back up again.

"Hm?" he hummed, following his travelling fingers with gleaming eyes.

"You still haven´t told me how you knew that I wanted to leave." It had been an utter shock for her when Gibbs had been standing right behind her as she had placed her resignation on his desk, being convinced she was doing it in secret. And she was extremely relieved that Gibbs had been the first to admit that he loved her. She would never have been able to do so.

Reluctantly tearing his eyes off her thigh, Gibbs looked up to meet Abby´s sparkling green eyes and he couldn´t help but smile. The smile widened to that mischievous grin of his and he brought his hand to the nape of her neck and gently pulled her down. Their faces were only an inch apart now.

"I didn´t know," he huskily whispered before drawing her into a passionate kiss, which Abby all too happily joined, because the night was not over yet.

And talking was not what they were up to right now... .

_**-**__**The End-**_

**_And again: The rest is left to your innocent imagination ;-)_**

(speaking of bunnies, for example ;-))

_**-xxx-**_

**Kelly, it really wasn´t easy to hide this from you. And I´m REALLY GLAD you like it!**

_**-xxx-**_

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_A/N: __I hope this sequel was not too confusing. But that´s what dreams and nightmares sometimes are. You probably have made this experience as well: you think you have woken up, only to find things get worse because you are still dreaming..._

Nice dreams to everyone!

ducky72


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